


john exit closet==>

by yourfavoritemartian



Category: Homestuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-09
Updated: 2014-02-09
Packaged: 2018-01-11 18:32:52
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 294
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1176460
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yourfavoritemartian/pseuds/yourfavoritemartian
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>A fanfiction written by *read  Russian accent* Martian and a small bit of help from her little tinker bull.<br/>John needs to start facing the truth when it comes to closets.</p>
            </blockquote>





	john exit closet==>

John Egbert and Dave Strider are playing a game of would you rather in Dave's apartment. "Would you rather jump off a cliff or get eaten by a crocodile?" Asks John.

"Get eaten by the crocodile. Sounds a lot cooler. Would you rather make out with a witch or an anime guy with cat ears?"

"I don't know, I'm not a homosexual so probably the witch."

"Really bro? We are talking about a fucking witch here." Says Dave.

"Not all witches are ugly though. Jade is a witch." John interjects.

"Yeah, but I'm talking about one of those really ugly ass witches. You know with the mole and green skin. Yeah I'm talking about those."

"Still, I'm not a homosexual."

"What about your whole Mic Cage thing going on?"

"That's entirely different." Then Dave stands up, grabs John's arm, pulls him out into the hallway, shoves him into a closet, and locks it. "You're only allowed to come out once you've come out of the closet."

"Let me out asshole! What closet are you talking about?"

"You know, the figurative one."

"There is no figurative closet! Only a real one! That you locked me in! Not cool bro!"

"It is cool. It's ironic. Irony is cool."

"Fine then! I'll just call your bro then! Bro! Bro! I need you! I'm in the closet!"

"Woah dude. Dave what did you do?" Bro walks in then looks at the closet then back at dave, "Nice going dude, now how are you going to feed it?"

"Wanna fill up Apple juice bottles with piss and wear cat ears and deliver the Apple piss to him?"

"Lets do it."

"Okay, let me go get the cat ears."

"Go get them? I have them in my pocket."

"Fuck YES!"


End file.
